Now, what does any of this have to do with a guy getting back at you?. They might want to be friends, they might want reconciliation, or they might want validation. The following Thursday I messaged to check in, he replied and said his head was all over the place. It makes no sense to me why she would suddenly change her mind over night. What should I do? It could be that they want to keep tabs on you, or they're hoping to get back together with you one day. Well, if the two of you just have this never ending no contact battle with one another then nothing is going to happen that could help you two reunite. How are things between you and your ex now? Of course, but he doesnt really need to in order for the NC to work. she looks like shes doing well without me, I have been so sad the month and I just want her back and i dont know what to do anymore. Every time he opens his social media apps, he should receive a new notification on how awesome your life is. Next morning she tweet this : You know when bitches be caught up on one guy in a world of 7.7 billion people? (Hey, who doesnt love a Captain American meme?). And because of this i have been so disrespectful to her. 10 Reasons Why My Ex Boyfriend Unfriended Me On Facebook There are no way he clicked the unfriend tab out of boredom. Be flawlessly polite and kind with all contact, but NEVER beg for your ex back. When your ex texts during no contact, you aren't aware of what their intention might be. You Keep Updating Your Status Like. We had our first and only kind of argument, she had been a little distant with me for a few days I could sense something wasnt quite right, i went to her house on the weekend we had a nice day together, her brother and mum were there and a few of her brothers friends came over, we had a bbq. Her family loved me as well and they told me they will miss me even though I will run into them from time to time. When someone asks why my ex blocked me, then this may refer to a blockade in front of you everywhere. He suddenly flared up and told me he does not want to have anything to do with me and he has blocked me on all social media platforms. You can do this! He responded again within 2hours.after that NC is continuing. Hope that you have moved on and are happy with your self. I wasnt her first boyfriend but I was her longest relationship so far (2 years) and she always told me I was the best boyfriend she had. If for the dumpee, the best way to heal and move on is to do no contact (which I agree, given the phrase out of sight, out of mind is certainly the best way to heal) why wouldnt the same apply for the dumper? So far we have talked about the progression that a guy goes through (in his mind) if he is going to get back at you. Dont remember? Technically this guy is not an ex.. we met back in 2014 and talked for months over the phone but never hung out he ended up getting back together with his high school sweet heart than in 2016 they broke up again and we talked he ended up getting back together with her finally in 2021 we matched on tinder he was still with her and ended up ghosting me months later he contacted me on a Facebook I didnt use.. we than matched on tinder again and he messaged me saying they had broke up three months prior and she had moved to another province.. Their status messages are going to show up on your news feed. Cant understand what is going on. Here's the downside, she's actively trying to set those feelings aside so she can go on living life without having to deal with them. What about then? When everyone had gone me and her were downstairs, her brother mum and daughter had gone to sleep. While I would tend to agree with that you are in a very unique situation here in that we are talking about your ex boyfriend. Lets say that you decide that you want to embark on the 30 day no contact period. I know that was an incredibly weird picture for me to paint right now but the point I am trying to make here is that your ex boyfriend knows that deep down HIS silence will hurt you and its his only way of getting back at you without actually seeming crazy. My ex boyfriend broke up with me two months after we moved in together after an argument. Thats because youll rationally discern that your ex wasnt a bad person and that you wouldnt mind getting back with your ex. I have kids and we broke up because he couldnt see a future for us dispite saying he is in love with me, Im the one blah blah blah. Eventually she got tired of me. Let's look at a few other benefits of following the no contact rule. Speaking from personal experience I can tell you that any time a girl I really like ignores me it bugs me on a deep level. You have managed your expectations about him reaching out during NC but you are a human being after all and you cant help but wonder why he has been silent on his end for 10 days straight. I know youre hurting and dont want to be forgotten, but dont let your destroyed self-esteem affect your rational thinking. In other words, they would have to be extremely egoistic and constantly meet new people. They may not like dumpees and have much respect for them, but they don't just forget they dated them. If you want your ex back because youre hurting and your relationship wasnt that great, you want your ex back for the wrong reasons. It is OK for me as I need time to trust again and want to know him better before embarking in a new relationship. No need to unfriend or block him if you take these steps. How To Forget About Your Ex And Be Happy Again? I feel good about myself a bit because I have the feeling I left a huge legacy and that another person will have to be extremely good to replace me. I made it clear I still wanted us to keep trying but she said she didn't think it would work out and wasn't in love with me anymore. I wouldnt be able to take her back on the spot, but if she would work for it really hard and show me things are different now, I might give her another chance. If you're the one that severed the relationship or did something that forced your partner to break it off with you, they may have some hurt feelings or anger issues to sort through. I have heard nothing. When you were a small baby and they neglected you for even a few seconds what did you do to get their attention? Answer (1 of 9): That's a good news for you bruh ! Learn how your comment data is processed. That means for 30 days you arent going to talk to your ex in any way shape or form. And also look into different living situations so you are not living together long term while broken up. Too many people fail to realize that being in love has one big negative, loss. I havent messaged him for over 5 weeks. Its me, im bitches. Lets start out with probably the most likely reason that he may not contact you during no contact, his stubborn nature. They literally asked me what I thought and when I told them that I thought it would be ok they decided against it because of that sense of entitlement. In so doing, you would only anger them, destroying your chances forever/longer. Obviously she was very upset about the whole not being contacted situation. People have a tendency to only remember the bad stuff about the relationships towards the end. Just not for her. That reason is that your ex doesn't want to get back with you. We ended on good terms, and I did a little begging on Thursday when he broke up with me but other than that I havent. It would help your ex feel better and give your ex enough time to experience life without you. (And I hadn't even made any move online to suggest how I felt or that anything had changed in my life.) To you, its all or nothing, as there is no middle option. We are 1 week into the no contact contract and its killing me I often ask if he misses me, if its really over I really want to know your opinion I have read almost every article about break ups and how to get together with my ex. What we are going to be talking about in this article is going to be a little involved and will require a bit of foundation on your part (i.e. Conclusion. Been blocked / unfriended on social media by an ex after months of NC By AL031, 6 years ago on Breaking up 6,574 Hi, I just need some help understanding what could be going through my ex boyfriends mind. I strongly suggest you let her think what she wants while you find someone who appreciates and values you. I really dont want her to forget about me and actually would like her to come crawling back. Did he even care?. In fact, I recently filmed a video about just that. Now, if your relationship wasnt that bad, your relationship probably didnt need to end, but it still did. This is the first step. Because it is these same women who come back with their tail between their legs when their ex boyfriend doesnt contact them at all saying that: I tried this and it didnt work.. What do I do now??????. I sent her a message asking how she is and she gladly replied that she is doing good. That likely wont end well for you as youll soon exhaust the person youre with and suffer another romantic rejection. Everyone has the right to leave a relationship. Of course, no contact works, don't contact him for 30 days before reaching out to him again. 3. What about when you were in high school and you really liked a boy who wouldnt give you the time of day? You see, most men make relationship decisions based on their emotions. I decided to walk away coz I felt i was being taken for granted. Mistake #1) Telling your ex you're going to go "No Contact". 2. You can pretty much assume that she still has feelings regarding you. Basically, it's just too painful for him/it bothers him/he doesn't want to see photos of you or know what you're doing/he wants to get the image of you . Hey Zan, But hey, I was young and I didnt know how to handle my emotions. Secondly, I can tell you that I am absolutely thrilled when a girl takes the initiative to message me. It shows you respect yourself, and arent willing to fight for a cheater. Document everything, from the mundane to the extravagant. Yes, there are time where you have to view it as a game (the talking phase, getting your ex back, etc.) Besides there are actually a few big advantages to making the first move. Its just that we are afraid to open up about it. In other words, his heart is having a major battle with his pride. After that happened he lost his job and had issues with his family and has had a pretty deep depression going on Ive stuck around and said I wasnt going anywhere but conversation started to be lucky if I got one to two texts a day. If he does happen to get in touch with you from anywhere between 21-30 days then I would consider that to be a pretty long time for an ex boyfriend to not respond to you. If you ever talk to her, it should be her idea not yours. Love your honesty, made me really think about my actions and his. What is in your control, however, are the mistakes you make after the breakup. Sure, you wont be on your exs mind as much as you would if you annoyed your ex by begging every day. We were not at full plus capacity and we began bickering with each other. In the beginning he was periodically call me and text me very little now that Im at this point he has been calling me every day as often as multiple times a day. Or it definitely etely over for him? Hes very stubborn. I honestly do not know what to do now because I am heart broken and feel shattered. What else are you worried about? Your email address will not be published. So, the scene I have just painted above is pretty simple. Give off the impression that you're happy. However, if you try to call and she doesn't answer, don't worry. One of the most asked questions I get from coaching clients is to explain the reasoning behind a man who doesnt contact you during the no contact period. Its crucial to retain your dignity and self-worth in your exs eyes when he or she says you arent good enough. Its been 5 months and no contact. All of this is irrelevant if she doesnt get to the last stage in decent time when you still want her. So, do yourself a favor and dont turn into that on me. Why do you think I want you to be the one to make the first move no matter what? The true purpose is to make him feel like a part of him misses you. Also, I have the option to move out of state for a new job.should I take that, or continue to be in the same city, despite her not knowing where I am etc. Sometimes it is up to you to reach out and form that emotional attachment. Its been a week, probably not long enough. Thus, when a breakup occurs a lot of us dont like talking about it. Do I mention hes deleted? Its a really messed up form of mental warfare on his part because he is doing it to hurt you (and he wants to hurt you.). Thanks for your time. I cant understand why he has done this as hes always been so set on being with me. They will sit around and say, Hes going to have to text ME first if he wants a date with me.. They have to be committed to doing so. Do you want your ex back because your relationship was good and youve never dated anyone as good as your ex or do you want your ex back just to ease your anxiety and feel secure? Anyways, it seems that I have developed a new pet peeve when it comes to communicating with you ladies. I have already defined what the no contact rule is in the opening paragraph of this guide but I havent really talked about what the purpose of it is. Its not that we dont care. Endure it The best thing u can do is focus on the present On what u r doing Dont let ur mind wander off to her.. Hope u live a happy life And things work out for u. Hi im in need of some help, so me and my ex of one year broke up about a month ago, we ended it on good terms and how we were gonna stay best friends and hows she is always going to want me in her life forever, we broke up because she was going through so much and she said that sometimes she felt more like a babysitter than a girlfriend and that since she was going through so much she couldnt be the caretaker for the both of us at the moment and that I have another year left of college left to figure myself out but that I was an amazing boyfriend , but then a day after my grandmother died and I did the stupid thing of telling her how much I miss her and how much wanted to be with her since she was also my best friend but that was because I was still in shock from my grandma died and then a week later she stopped snapchatting me and I said that idk if she hates me or not but if we could at least keep the streak and she said that snapchat is an everyday thing and that we are supposed to be giving space, that has been two weeks almost 3, I miss the girl like crazy, shes the love of my life and I want is to get her back but I having such a hard time not trying to text her its taking sheer force of will not to. Well, just because a man is stubborn and wont contact you doesnt mean that he doesnt miss you it just means what we all already know, hes an idiot :p . Hi I initiated no contact and he messaged me after 2 weeks. Fourth, Over Analyzing. She said that she doesnt know how to make you happy and that she feels that she just makes you mad. We dated for a year and then broke up, he didnt think his feeling were where mine are and whilst they are growing for me he fears he wont get to a stage where I am. Do you remember what I said at the beginning of this section? Thank you so much No Contact Rule is equal to leaving your ex-partner alone for some time (i.e a few days, some weeks, 30 days, 45+) or giving your ex some space that provokes his/her thoughts regarding your relationship. to name a few. But if your ex is smart, your ex will work on them so that your ex doesnt encounter the same issues in the next relationship. You cant fix that or them. Dumpees assume that dumpers are coming back around, but most of the time, dumpers are showing interest and expressing themselves strongly only because they want reassurance and help. I done so much for her in the last 2 and half months helped her with things, advice on stuff, picked her daughter up with her and thats fine I done it because I like her I expect nothing in return for good deeds but its made me feel like cant she see i made one silly mistake I was frustrated people have arguments in relationships you learn about each other in a way from these type of things!! He may discover what he actually was experiencing before when he said he was "tired of you," was just the normal up and down of relationship. So, they are probably going to be thinking of the whole no contact experience as a game. If he or she does see this side of you, your ex is going to avoid you like the plague. He became indifferent although he occasionally told me he loved me. If he doesnt then he doesnt and it will be his loss., (And again, if he doesnt contact you that doesnt mean that NC didnt work.). One of the most overlooked factors when it comes to the no contact rule is how the actual breakup will affect your boyfriend. Most women get extremely depressed when an ex boyfriend doesnt message them at all during the no contact period. Because I have literally been in that position before. Following the no contact rule puts the power back in your hands. Are Dumpers Afraid To Contact Their Dumpees? This is me taking responsibility for not explaining the no contact rule as thoroughly as I should have. He wanted to meet and said that he understood that he loves me but is not ready to propose. These things are completely out of your control. My bf and I were together over 6 years. I think a relationship with this person will be difficult because times like this make him want to flee. I walked away not because I dont love her (till now i really do) but its because I wanted her to focus on the things that she wants in life. This is always best done over the phone, because it's easier for you to attract her by being confident and making her laugh, smile and feel good to be talking to you again. Will my ex move on, and Ill never hear from my ex again?. Sometimes it really pays to be the first one making the move on your ex because not only can you control things a little bit better it is always kind of nice when a guy feels wanted. Day 46 NC and deleted me on WhatsApp. In fact, a lot of readers love when I go on one of my tangents about how important it is to be logical. However, there is also a time where it is very important to be emotional. I wanted to impose the No Contact rule but eventually I broke it. We dont know what will happen. To make your ex boyfriend miss you right? A Bothersome Ex. In reality, it delays the time it would normally take to get on talking terms, because they associate all negativity, such as your neediness and the new anger they feel as a result of your persistence, with you. Heres the issue. And yet, that simple idea turns out to be one of the hardest things to successfully complete when it comes to the ex recovery process. How long do you recommend I do no contact before reaching out? Me and my ex were only together 2 and a half months and it may sound stupid to some people I get that, but in that time Ive never felt such a strong connection with someone as I did with her, it felt like we had known each other years. The first thing I do is answer my coaching clients (since its common for them to have a lot of questions.) My pride told me not to do it but my heart wanted to so bad. Seriously, they will sit around and cry because he didn't call or text. Good luck!! When an ex contacts you after no contact and you broke up because you were too distant Let's say that you and your ex broke up because they didn't feel like you were there for them enough. Essentially what I am going to be doing here is bridging the gap between you and your ex boyfriend. An ex boyfriend is going to message you if he feels an emotional attachment to you. Didnt even explain why he ended it, The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back, The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide), What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means, Heres Exactly What Hes Thinking During The No Contact Rule, What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You. I don't know why so many people feel the need to tell their ex that they plan to use No Contact. Remember, the no contact rule is only the first step of the entire ex boyfriend recovery process. They prevent you from moving on. It could be entirely possible that your ex boyfriend has gone through the following progression. , This may work in some situations but 8 have serious doubts.and I know for sure it killed my relationship.i kicked my commonlaw girlfriend out for not communicatingbreaking all our relationship rules and boundaries by planning to move out behind my back.qhen I called her on it she broke down into name calling and lies..so I locked her out violence was a.step away and two kids were in the house..i was not going to allow that.after i locked her out she no contact melol big mistake.you do not ever no contact someone you love this will destroy trust and shows a COMPLETE lack of respect to the person you love anyone who does this to me will never see me again period.i filed we are now in court contact through lawyers only.dont try the no contact with a real man its internet bs. If a guy has broken up with you the emotions he is going to experience after the breakup may cause him to feel like he was the victim. I did not wanted really get committed too soon in a relationship and would have preferred to take my time too. Now, I am not saying that everyone with that attitude will get their ex boyfriends back. what should I do? Always leave it to your ex to contact you again. Your ex will think about you more because youll become mysterious and make your ex wonder what youre doing and how youre coping with the breakup. Why the No-Contact Rule Does Not Work It's fair to say that a lot of people struggle to maintain 30 dayslet alone 60 daysof no contact with their ex. Sometimes they focus on themselves and others and see no reason to go back to their ex. Appreciate the effort though if youve replied. Give full vent to your feelings in the comments section below the post. Would you rather him do it? However, his pride is telling him not to do it. I'm guessing that maybe whoever shes dating tells her to block you. Make sure you dont pressure him. By being mindful of your response and the way you react to their . We lived together and got along very well. Andtry to avoid women like this in future. If you stay friends with your ex, right after the break-up, you are going to suffer and stay friends until you choose to go separate ways. Towards on our 8th month, she started writing again. She said she still loves me and misses me but knwing she cant guarantee that she would compromise on us, she would like us to become friends instead. 4. Miss you and simple whats up will let her know that its cool hearing from her but you arent pressed. I want YOU to take the first step and contact your ex boyfriend via a text message. 9 Secretly Obsessed: He Avoids Any Events With Mutual Friends. Men like to be left alone after the breakup. In the beginning of this month my boyfriend broke up with me because he said he didnt feel the same as he felt before the lockdown, he told he as been feeling like this for 3 weeks now (its important to know that he suffers from diagnosed anxiety). I replied the next morning saying I enjoyed it too and said have a good day. Towards the beginning of this guide I went on this whole rant about how the no contact rule can still be working even if your ex doesnt contact you. So, there is no use getting all depressed over a strategy that is literally at its beginning. If you were to have the attitude that I described above, the entitlement attitude, then the chances are high that nothing will get done. You, its all or nothing, as there is also a time where it to... Them to have a good news for you as youll soon exhaust the person youre with and suffer another rejection! Is answer my coaching clients ( since its common for them to have a of! 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